Monday, August 20, 2012

Last Bermuda Sunset

Every Ending Brings a New Beginning

Life's Infinite Supply of Moments


Bermuda sunset-
No it is not the last Bermuda sunset ever but it is the last one for me and this vacation. Tonight is my last evening in Bermuda on this family vacation and as the trip comes to a close I am aware of all that awaits me when I return home. It may be the end of this vacation but it is just the start of my second fall semester at Penn. I am home less than four days before hoards of people begin returning to campus looking forward to the highly anticipated new student orientation, more commonly referred to as "NSO," that precedes the start of classes. It is hard for me to believe that this time last year I was anxiously awaiting the Fall semester, nervous about living with a house full of strangers, and concerned that I would remain an anonymous person among the sea of students that pack into frat houses during NSO, flood Locus Walk (the main walk way through the heart of campus) when classes begin, and wait on line at campus bars crossing their fingers that the bouncers don't detect their fake IDs. Now I eagerly await the start of NSO and the Fall semester. I have a hand full of friends that I look forward to seeing and can count on if I am in need. I have innumerable acquaintances and familiar faces that I can casually say hello to at a party or on my way to class. And I have a nearly finished apartment on a street where I know people living in at least half a dozen of the neighboring houses. I am returning not just to campus but to a life that I have managed to build for myself over the past twelves months. School work didn't stop me. Isolation and illness couldn't stop me. A leave of absence didn't stand in my way. Despite the number of obstacles put before me I still managed to build I semblance of a life that I look forward to returning to and hope to continue to build upon. Yes summer is ending but with it a comes a fresh start, a new semester, and opportunities to continue creating a life that I am happy with. I like to think of life as having an infinite supply of moments- it is a continuous project and experience. While one moment is ending another is just revving up to begin.  We are never given too much time to mourn the loss of one moment because the next one is sneaking up right behind it. Think of life as a succession of moving moments gives it a different type of energy. It's constantly in motion, exciting, bursting with experiences- this energy is the very essence of life itself! It's exciting! It's new and it's non-stop (relatively speaking...)! 

Back to school !
“Ends are not bad things, they just mean that something else is about to begin. And there are many things that don't really end, anyway, they just begin again in a new way. Ends are not bad and many ends aren't really an ending; some things are never-ending.” 

-C. JoyBell C.

I used a quote from this same person the other day and now I am inspired to look into her a little more and discover what she is all about. I chose this quote because I feel as if it covers all possible scenarios- endings  as signifying a new beginning, endings that continue but somehow differently, and ends that never happen. I think my starting this school year is of the second type- a beginning that is really just a new continuation of something that has already started. (This whole topic and way of wording is starting to get really confusing so I'm sorry if you are having a difficult time following.) But what I mean is I have already left George Washington University and started my new beginning at Penn last Fall. So this fall is not really a new beginning it just a continuation of last year's beginning but it is radically different. It is high degree of difference that makes it feel like a completely new start. However it is not 100% new. I have already started my life at Penn last year, albeit it was interrupted, so this Fall is not really the start of a totally new life for me. But it is the beginning of a new experience as a seasoned Penn student with connections to a life there and a foundation to build upon. While other things in life fit into the other two categories. My time at G.W. has truly ended (thank G-d) while my relation to my family or some friends is truly never-ending. This quote inspires me to look at my life differently and categorize different event into the three categories- ending, changing, and never-ending. When I think about it is most difficult for me to put events or situations into the never-ending category because it seems to me that even if something isn't ending it manages to change or shift or evolve. Even my relationships with my family and some friends- while they are not ending they are definitely changing. My relationship with myself is always evolving as well. I can't really think of a moment that is never-ending except for perhaps life's infinite supply of moments. Although even life's supply of moments ends at some point- when we cease to exist (sorry to get morbid on you.) Anyways this whole entry has gotten far more philosophical than I had originally planned. It's starting to feel a bit sloppy and unorganized and I'm quite sure that any one who began reading has probably stopped at this point because it was too difficult to follow. But I did have a point when I began and I would like to end on it because I think it's quite true- every ending brings a new
No such thing as a dead end-
beginning. So as one era of your life comes to a close- college, a career, your children moving out- remember that sooner rather than later a new era will come barging in giving you little time to mourn the end of the previous era. Embrace the gift of a new beginning that every ending brings. Recognize the energy and momentum of the never ceasing supply of moments. Use this energy and these opportunities to your advantage by seizing each new momentum and creating something fabulous for yourself! I plan to feed off of all the energy and new moments life throws at me this Fall and continue to create a life that I am happy with and that I love!

Loving life is the only way to live,
xo


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